A Eunuch's Love Life

The more personally intimate blog of the love life of an androgynous but not sexless eunuch in this post-modern world

Monday, February 04, 2008

the softening of norrie mAy-welby

I can't take it for granted. If I hadn't made the fateful choice to change sex, what are the odds I'd be getting thoroughly plowed by a gorgeous huge black hunky Maori rugby player who is so infatuated he says " I love you" and chemically means it? I mean, sure, some middle aged queens may be able to pull this off, but not as easily as this sort of thing happens for me as a transsexual street sex worker.


What a honey! What blessed luck, after having a super spunky lean muscled boy a couple of nights ago! I am in the flow! The Universe brings me what makes me happy, and I give happiness in return!


He was a god! He gave great head! My pelvic muscles were pumping big time! I wanted to rub myself with all of his sexy body, so I did! And ooh so kissy, big soft lips, happy loving eyes, handsome handsome man, so HUGE and I didn't mean that in particular, I meant the awesome size of his giant muscley body, but yes, everything was in proportion, and no steroid damage evident.


Obviously a bit pissed (sorry, American readers, that's drunk), with a slight variation in the turgidity department, but then the large spongy ones are more subject to the effects of alcohol. And I thank Beer Goggles for his thinking I was so sexy. I mean sure, I am sexy, but I think his declaration of love for a street prostitute he had known for ten minutes can be credited to some ethanol enhancement of his oxytocin levels.


Ah, the gods love me! Bacchus, god of booze, Aphrodite, goddess of sex and sensuality and sex work, and Apollo and Ares, who manifested as this hunky rugby warrior, and then there was the divine lean smooth slim Krsna last time I was out.. Thanks be to Heaven!


And thanks be to modern medicine! The hormones I've been taking for nearly three weeks have many effects, including psychoactive (so far making me more interested in more men), and my skin has changed noticeably already, although of course the most noticeable change are my breast developments. "MY breast developments".. see, I have a sense of ownership of them now, a pleasant change from seeing them as alien protrusions destroying my hard-line androgyny. Softer androgyny is powerful too in its own way… and seems to attract more of the hardness I crave from another ; )



I seem to have swiftly turned upwards in the U shape of happiness, recently announced as dipping at 44 (years of age) for all humans regardless of other factors.



I remember that year.. I simply resolved to make my life as sexy as I wanted it to be, and celebrated my birthday doing a show with the uber sexy Asian Male Dancers! That was also the year I met Best Friend, who was seeking mentorship of sorts, and I certainly have the age for that (being twenty years older than him). And the year before I threw myself into the queer anarchist scene organising the Sydney Queeruptions festival, after purposefully seeking out a new social scene when I realised I had no life outside work.... So, as a result of some lucky preparation for my mid-life crisis, I am happily immersed in youth culture, hedonism, and anarchy; every dancefloor I go to, the DJs make me feel like a superstar, and I am loved as a special old hippy sister by my gorgeous young friends. And loved in a deeper way by kind and generous gentlemen ; )



This is my life. This is not a rehearsal. This is not a preparation exercise. This is it, this is the life I have. Mmmmm. It IS good. Crazy and unconventional, but that make be more appropriate for these swiftly changing times.



When my amorous sports god said " I love you" in his aroused state, I didn't rebuff him, or tell him this was silly. I smply told him "Love's all that matters."



Childless, unmarried, unpropertied, unemployed, not even a working mobile phone at present, I am happy because I chose love, and I choose love, and love IS all that matters.



The Universe loves you too.



x

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